Thursday, September 15, 2011

Survivor South Pacific Premiere with Russell Hantz's Nephew Plus the Return of Ozzy & Coach

The opening episode of Season 23 of Surivor sort of held my interest.

I don't know what island they are on in the South Pacific or why it is not specifically named, but I do know this time the island came with beaches that are allowing swimming, unlike the past couple iterations of Survivor.

Survivor South Pacific could also be called Survivor South Pacific: Redemption Island Part 2, due to the keeping of the annoying, to me, Redemption Island gimmick.

Part of the Redemption gimmick is having a couple of previous tribe bootees from previous seasons return for redemption. Last time it was Russell Hantz and Rob Mariano returning, with Boston Rob getting Ultimate Redemption by winning the million bucks.

Just like it was with the original Redemption Island, last night's opening episode was skewed by the return of the two familiar faces of Benjamin "Coach" Wade and Oscar "Ozzy" Lusth, both having been on Survivor twice previous.

For his latest Survivor appearance Ozzy is looking a bit ridiculous with really long curly hair. I've really not been able to look at Ozzy the same way ever since I saw him perform carnally, repeatedly, on Playboy's Foursome TV Show. On that show Ozzy was agile in ways we've not seen on Survivor. And with a lot less clothing, with no blurring.

Coach was not warmly greeted by his tribe upon arrival. Ozzy was warmly greeted. Coach mucked up the opening reward challenge against Ozzy, with further annoyed his tribe. But, Coach quickly redeemed himself, leading his tribe to building a shelter. And by not acting like a nutcase.

Ozzy on the other hand did not encourage shelter building and instead lead his tribe in a group float in the Pacific.

Was I observing correctly? Were the tribes provided with all sorts of of building and fishing material? Thick bamboo logs, rope, machetes, fishing spear. The Upolu tribe's residence looked almost furnished by IKEA upon completion.

My favorite character, so far, is translucent pale boy, John Cochran. His Savaii Tribe lost the Immunity Challenge, which somehow had Cochran on the chopping block against the girl who could not make a coconut basket, Semhar Tadesse. Cochran ardently plead his case at Tribal Council and in the end, despite what we'd been lead to believe would happen, the tribe unanimously sent Semhar to Redemption Island.

Meanwhile over on the Upolu tribe the most interesting thing going, besides the Redemption of Coach, was Brandon Hantz, he being the nephew of the notorious Survivor villain, Russell Hantz. Brandon is out to redeem the family name and prove to the world that not all Hantz's are conniving, bullying, hidden immunity idol finding, socially inept meannies.

However, despite Brandon's good Christian intentions to be a really good boy, his dark side got the better of him, turning him into a leering bit of a perv, fixated on Lingerie Football Player, Mikayla Wingle, in a not too wholesome way. What is a Lingerie Football Player, I can't help but wonder?

Brandon said he wanted to keep his Hantz name shame a secret. But he has Hantz tatooed twice on his upper body. So, he had to resolve to keep his shirt on, lest his shame be revealed. In the previews for next week, we see that Brandon reveals his hideous secret to Coach. I could not make out Coach's words, in what seemed a not too favorable reaction.

Exepct for the booted Semhar, she being something called a "Spoken Word Artist," none of the females made much of an impression on me. Well, there was the crying older lady, who Ozzy calmed down with his zen mantras.

The token gay guy, this time, is a retired NYPD Detective, Mark Caruso. He is only 48, but looked older, to me. He is called Papa Bear.

Another memorable Survivor, on the Savaii Tribe, is Jim Rice. He is memorable, to me, due to lying that he was some sort of science teacher, when in reality he dispenses marijuana medically.

Even though I believe Survivor has Jumped the Shark, I may keep watching. I was fairly well entertaining by the opening episode.

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