Dancing With The Stars Hines Ward Gets Perfect Scores But Chelsa Kane Gets More Points

Last night was the first time I watched Hines Ward dance on Dancing With The Stars. To shorten the two hour dance marathons I had been fast forwarding past dancers I had no interest in, or had no clue as to what made them a supposed star.

Like that Romeo kid who left last week.

This week on DWTS long bios introduced each dancer. The bio suddenly turned Hines Ward into someone very interesting.

Til last night I had no idea Hines Ward was born in Seoul, South Korea, to a black dad, Hines Ward Sr. and a Korean mom, Kim Young He. When Hines was 1 the family moved to Georgia, with his soldier dad soon sent to Germany on a tour of duty. A year later Hines mom and dad divorced, with his dad convincing a court that Hines' mom could not raise him because she did not speak English. So, Hines went to live with his dad's mom til he was seven.

We heard from Hines' mom on Monday's DWTS. She now speaks English.

Hines' mom seemed to think he really had no business dancing. But, on Monday's show, Hines and partner, Kym Johnson, scored all 10 on both dances, getting 60 points for a salsa and Argentine tango. I am sure someone has made perfect scores before, but I don't remember who.

The perfect scores were made even more impressive due to the fact that Kym injured her neck while practicing on Friday, while attempting a tricky lift which had Kym falling on her neck and Hines falling on top of her. Paramedics rushed in and took Kym to the hospital.

Carrie Ann Inaba is way too easily driven to tears, and was so driven on Monday by the Hines and Kym tango.

Chelsea Kane and Mark Ballas came in first for the night, with 73 points, after winning the third dance of the night, something called the "Winner-Take-All Cha-Cha."

Kirstie Alley and Maksim Chmerkovskiy came in 3rd with 54 points after doing some Viennese waltzing and  and paso dobling. Carrie Ann was not driven to tears, but did crown Kirstie as the "Queen" of the dramatic Latin dance.

Ralph Macchio and Playboy model, Karina Smirnoff were in last place with only 48 points. For the salsa Ralph wore something called a "booty pad" to make his butt bigger to supposedly improve his butt-shaking moves. I did not notice any increase in butt size. Or any consequent extra shaking. I probably was paying more attention to the Playboy model.

Next week is the DWTS's finale. I'd like to lose Chelsea and Mark tonight and have Ralph, Kirstie and Hines in the finale. I like the Chelsea kid, but Mark wears on my nerves.

Anticlimatic End to Survivor Redemption Island with Boston Rob Mariano Winning the Million Dollar Prize

What a surprising, shocking finale to Survivor: Redemption Island.

Rob Mariano won the million bucks.

In the end it was Rob against Natalie and Phillip.

A groupie and a stooge.

Andrea managed to be the Redemption Island final duel winner by being the last to break a vase. Andrea's return to the game did not last long.

Rob used his Hidden Immunity Idol at the last opportunity to do so, even though it ended up not being necessary, so well-trained was his cult. And then Rob won the last Immunity Challenge, guaranteeing Rob as the winner on Rob's 4th time on Survivor.

The jury inquisition of Natalie, Rob and Phillip was, to me, the most boring in Survivor history. Mostly due, I assume, to the fact that Rob being the winner was a foregone conclusion at that point.

This season of Survivor rubbed me the wrong way right from the start, with the arrival, back in the game, of Rob and Russell, right after they'd been on Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains.

It's like Rob had some deal with CBS to let him keep coming on Survivor until he won. Russell Hantz would like to win Survivor really bad too. Will a way be found to have Russell back on Survivor for his 4th time?

I really thought it was God's plan, ardent Survivor viewer that He be, for Matt to be the one to go back in game from Redemption Island, win the Immunity Challenges and be the Sole Survivor. But, apparently God likes Boston Rob more than Matt.

On Sunday I did not watch past Boston Rob winning, so I have no idea what exciting location the next Survivor is going to take place in. Or what Redemption Island type wrinkle has been added. Or if Russell is going return again.

How Is Ashton Kutcher Going to Replace Charlie Sheen on Two and a Half Men?

I'm guessing it is going to be interesting to see how Ashton Kutcher replaces Charlie Sheen on Two and a Half Men.

Is Kutcher taking over the role of Charlie Parker?

Or will there be some other means to get Ashton into Charlie's house to live with Alan and Jake?

Surely they are not going to do a Bewitched type thing where Dick Sargent replaced Dick York as Darrin Stevens with no explanation, not even something as simple as having Endora cast a spell to change Darrin's looks.

Maybe the plot could have had Charlie having spent extensive time in re-hab, to emerge as a much better looking, taller, version of his former self.

Or they could have Charlie dying in some comic way, to have it revealed that he left his money, royalties and house to his ne'er do well cousin, Ashton.

They could have Charlie in an accident that requires facial reconstruction.

Two and a Half Men will not be paying Ashton Kutcher as much as they paid the ungrateful Charlie Sheen. Sheen got $1.25 million per episode, plus profit participation that brought the total to around $2 million per episode. Ashton supposedly will be getting a measly rumored $625,000 to $800,000 per episode.

$800,000 is more than I make in an entire year. I don't know what I make for an episode.

The Real Housewives Of New York City Was Boring Again This Week Til Sonja Forgot Her Underwear

The last episode of The Real Housewives of New York City started off so boring I was thinking it was maybe time to bail.

But, then I remembered this was going to be the episode where Sonja's derriere gets exposed.

Again.

The boring stuff before Sonja's unfortunate exposure included a long look at Cindy's abode. And the kid's she bred by in vitro fertilization.

The guy who provided the material that was used to do the fertilizing showed up. Cindy's brother does not like the guy.

The sperm donor seemed sort of creepy to me. And then Cindy tells us that they had been an off and on again couple. And that they were on at the time she got pregnant, and then off two months later.

So, why were they using the in vitro method to make a baby and not the old-fashioned way?

Did Jill come to visit Cindy? I think I remember some Jill comments about nannies and the house being a mess.

For some reason Cindy asked Jill to go to the dentist with her. That seemed weird. And then Jill made it even weirder when she started acting like a co-dentist. Jill informed us that she and her mother and sister have the gift of having doctor's skills with no license.

Jill has really made it clear she has no clue why the fans have turned on her. Bad Jill was on display this episode.

And then we kept cutting to Sonja's, where she was fussing over her costume for her Masquerade party. That was all so totally boring. Except for the strange part where Sonja explains that she has friends who will call her from Europe, asking if someone could stay with her. We learned this when she explained who the houseboy was she was ordering to make her tea.

Something is very wrong with Sonja this year.

Sonja's Masquerade party was held in a little place called The Vault. The housewives and husbands arrived, fawning over how great they looked. Alex and Simon were Cleopatra and Mark Anthony. Not the one married to Jennifer Lopez. Alex looked good with black hair.

And then Jill arrived and proceeded to bad mouth Sonja's bad parties, the small room, the small number of guests, the bad food.

And then suddenly Sonja realized she'd forgotten a key part of her costume. Her bloomers. Or whatever she called them. She learned this while Jill  was next to her. Jill had a real good view and proceeded to inform everyone that Sonja had an enormous bruise on her butt.

Sonja was very loud about her missing underwear. Letting everyone know she was not fully dressed.

Next up was Ramona's product launch party for her Pinot Grigio line. The Countess asked Ramona one technical question after another about Ramona's wine. Til Ramona could take it no longer. The Countess, at times, really seems like she has something wrong with her.

At some point Jennifer, who's wedding we attended during the first episode, told Ramona about some bad Jill behavior at Jennifer's wedding where Jill grilled Jennifer about why she invited Alex and Simon. And about how well she knew Ramona.

Ramona took extreme umbrage. And of course, after fueled by enough Pinot, confronted Jill, who denied it all. Jill never answers a direct question. It's very annoying. Jill then left in a huff, and ran into Jennifer, totally distorting what had just happened. Then Jill went back into Ramona's party and lied about the talk she'd just had with Jennifer.

Next we see Jill crying with LuAnn, with the Countess tackily adding fuel to the fire.

I think the simple explanation for Jill, in addition to being a narcissist, is that she is a pathological liar. They are the worst of the liar breed. Because they believe their lies while they are doing their lying. And then they get mad at you when you catch them in a lie, which usually just causes more lying.

I really can not stand Cindy.

On Survivor Phillip Found His Shorts While Grant was Sent to Redemption Island

Last week after watching Survivor I mentioned I'd forgotten to notice if Phillip was still wandering around in his pink panties. Or if more suitable shorts had been found to replace the shorts that Julie had buried.

Well, as you can see, Phillip was wandering around in his pink panties this week. And then, later in the show, he was back in shorts that looked like the ones Julie buried.

Why were we shown nothing about how Phillip acquired new shorts?

In the parts of the latest episode that weren't as important as Phillip's shorts mystery, Andrea survived her duel on Redemption Island after a cool reception from her jilted lover, Matt. Ralph had a big lead in the Redemption Island duel, then quickly faltered when figuring out a puzzle was required.

Rob continues to have complete control of his cult.

Ashley was the intended bootee, but went and spoiled Rob's plan by winning immunity and a big feast which she shared with Natalie.

It was then Grant who got the blindside at Tribal Council.

I am beginning to think that Jeff Probst needs to dial it down during challenges. The play by play gets annoying. And at Tribal Council he needs to stop with what seems, at times, to amount to directing the Survivors as to what to think.

Rob is being pretty funny. He verbalized what many viewers also wonder. As in at what point now does the player return from Redemption Island? I assume on Sunday's show the first thing we will see is a final duel with the winner re-joining the tribe. That would make 6 on the tribe.

Is 6 the number that usually is in play at this stage in the game? I don't remember, but if I had to guess I'd say the number is usually 5.

The last Survivor finale my DVR messed up by not recording the third hour. I must try and remember to rectify that this time.

Lady Gaga Advises Scotty McCreery To Treat His Microphone Like His Girl Friend While James Durbin Leaves American Idol

Google's Blogger has been in major malfunction mode, which prevented me from blogging.

So, I am 2 days past Lady Gaga's interesting appearance on this week's American Idol.

I found all Lady Gaga's mentoring to be amusing, with the most amusing being the mentoring done to 17 year old Scotty McCreery.

Telling the kid to treat his microphone like his girl friend, to make sweet love to it. I forget what else.

And then Lady Gaga stood up and walked over to Scotty. The shorts Lady Gaga was wearing were very interesting. Actually, I could not tell for sure if she was wearing any shorts.

Scotty's reactions were funny, as were his comments, post-Gaga.

Lady Gaga seemed to be giving good advice. I thought all did well. I was surprised that it was James Durbin who got the tearful boot on Thursday and not Haley Reinhart or Lauren Alaina.

I am sort of disappointed we won't be seeing a James Durbin hometown visit. It likely would have been very interesting. With a lot of tears jerked.

I've read in the past couple days that Lady Gaga wants to be on Glee. A Lady Gaga appearance on Glee would likely be highly amusing.